Sometimes I wish that certain people were dead

And others would live forever,

That I could torture my childhood bullies

And redo lost fights with past lovers.

Sometimes I hate strangers on sight

And sometimes I love them.

Sometimes I talk to myself,

Sing in the shower,

Cry for no reason,

Skip washing my hands,

Squash bugs and smile,

And ogle sexy cartoon characters.

I wonder what dogs and birds are thinking,

Why mosquitoes bite,

Why I snot,

And why “goose” are “geese” but “moose” aren’t “meese”.

Sometimes I’m terrified but I smile

And I’m happy but I hate it.

Most times I fear or worship myself.

But craziest of all is not that I know I’m crazy,

But that you think you’re not.